I’ve been at a very vulnerable point in my life lately. When I was younger I devoted a lot of time to progressing in my spiritual journey, going to meditation and yoga and reading every self help book I could get my hands on. However, life got in the way and my focus went to something else that didn’t require so much work and dedication.
Lately I’ve gotten so comfortable in my routine, in my place in the universe and the predictability that each day provided. Then about 2 weeks ago I decided I wasn’t happy with my situation I started back up on my spiritual journey and about 3 days after I returned back to my path of mindfulness and inner peace, everything in my life was turned upside down.
I don’t want to put it out there now, but so many different little things happened this last week a half that it’s hard to ignore that the universe is speaking to me directly. However, I wish I knew what the message is and how I can learn from this situation. And then 2 days ago my roommate of the last 3 years messaged me on Facebook to tell me I have to find a new place to live by April because her new boyfriend will be moving in. It felt like life as a I knew it was falling apart. Hadn’t I had enough changes, don’t I have enough on my plate right now, do I really need to worry about something else? I longed for the comfort of the routine of each day and wished for the anxiety of the unknown to go away.
However, it is not accident that my spiritual journey started and then the rug was pulled from under me. I don’t know if the universe felt like I was finally strong enough for the changes it brought me, or it heard the thoughts that I didn’t want to admit to myself that I am not happy but I am also not strong enough to make the changes on my own and I need a push like a baby bird out of the nest thats felt so comfortable. I know that everything will work out in the end. Even though the anxiety is still tugging at my heart and at my mind, I know that I will look back at this as an exciting beginning to a new chapter. I cannot wait to look at this in six months or a year with fondness and think to myself if you only knew how good things are about to get.
Being in nature has always helped quiet my anxious mind.